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Godzilla U.S.A (1998)
The winning director duo from Independence
Day return to give an American taste to the greatest of giant movie monsters,
Godzilla. And what a great attempt, if you ask me. They certainly do
everything possible to make this OUR Godzilla, and separate him from his
Japanese father. Except for the roar, which was only changed a little,
everything about this G is totally different. He's a mutated iguana, as
opposed to an ancient dinosaur. He was nuked by the French, instead of us
Americans. He can give birth...'nuff said.
The action is great, the specials are a
blowout for anyone too familiar with the " man in rubber suit treatment
", and despite the 2 hour length, it's a fun, fun movie. So where does it
go wrong? Why did all the critics hate it? Why did it puke at the box-office?
Easy. Despite their best efforts, Dean Devlin and Roland Emmerich could not
make this Godzilla feel like the G we all know and love, and that leaves you
with a bad taste in your mouth. Instead of the invincible and either good or
evil creature of the past, this monster gets nuked by F-18 missiles with
little effort, and is as innocent as the day it was hatched. You feel saddened
that the poor thing gets fried, because it really didn't deserve it. Sure it
tried to eat Matthew Broderick and his pathetic girlfriend, but who wouldn't?
She put the title of " overacting " to a new low.
But it is fun. Parents be warned, though,
that the language is pretty out there sometimes, and also annoying. Major
Hicks feels that he simply has to include a curse of some sort with every
sentence. Otherwise, the violence is quite tame. About the worst it gets is
the baby Godzilla's... the Minyas from Hell as I like to call them...attacking
and eating the French guys, which you don't see. MMMMM, French food!! I can
see one Baby talking to the other...
" Do you think this would go better with
seasoning?"
"Who cares about seasoning? If you have
to eat meat, better to eat it raw. Just watch out for the little bits of this
guy's glasses."
" Don't you just hate havin' to pick
those bits of cloth from between your teeth?"
" Do you think Martha Stewart has a good
recipe for French Man minyan?"
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