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Breakin'

Released: 1984

So, you go to your video store and decide you want to see a movie with lots of dancing and almost no story. You look and look and just when you're about to give up, the nerd behind the counter points out the obscure title: Breakin'. Oh joy!

Yes, this movie does indeed have lots of dancing. Mostly it's of the break-dance variety, although it has some jazz dance / gymnastics-type stuff and ???

Unfortunately, the storyline is not important and all you end up doing is watching angst-filled black guys trying to out-dance other angst-filled black dudes.

The storyline follows Kelly (AKA 'Special K') who is taking a dance class from some guy named Adam (Phineas Newborn III). He thinks he's the bomb as well as God's gift to women. Adam keeps coming onto Kelly (:Lucinda Dickey) and she ends up leaving his class.

One of her friends, Franco (Ben Lokey) takes her to see some break dancing and one of the guys there falls in love with her. His name is Ozone (Adolfo Quinones) and he dresses like a pimp. Of course, Franco is obviously gay, what with his lisp, his actions, and his clothing. Anyway, Ozone and his compatriot, Turbo (Michael Chambers) end up in a tiff with some losers that think they can out-dance Ozone et al.

The first dance takes place in some building with lots of graffiti on the walls. Ice-T does the MC-ing and while the dancing is good, they end up losing. Why? Because a girl on the opposing team jumps out and shakes her booty. She looks like a monkey and can't dance nearly as well as anyone else in the show, but somehow her appearance makes the 'bad guys' win. What the!?

Thus, Kelly joins with Ozone and Turbo to learn their moves so she can help them beat those jerks at the next break-dance get-together. She also tries to get her agent, James (Christopher McDonald) to get them into a contest with other professional dancers so that she can show the world how cool break dancing is. He has to see to believe though, so he attends their bout with the jerks.

This is another lame dance scene. Yes, some of the moves were cool (although suggestive), but monkey-girl still can't dance and when Kelly comes on, all she does is some flips and a couple of lame-o moves. What a let-down! We've seen her training, so we know she's capable of kicking big-time butt, but it's just not to be. Of course, they win because Kelly is a stinky dancer but I guess because she stinks AND flips, she's better.

Yes, the trio ends up getting into the contest, but not through official channels. Kelly's old teacher, Adam tries to block them at every turn and they end up thumbing their noses at everyone and dancing for the judges even though the judges want nothing to do with them and keep calling for them to leave. STUPID!!! While this dance is ok, it's nothing special. Also, some music just starts up from who-knows-where (I assumed it was just in the dancers' heads at first, but the judges end up bopping to the beat...). Of course they get that part, even though the judges were looking for jazz dancers.

The Good Stuff:

The Bad Stuff:

Overall, the show was flat. Some of the dancing rocked, but it needed a story to back it up, not something that was tacked on as an afterthought. And that gay guy was just plain disturbing.

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